I apologize for the negative post previous to this one! Sometimes I feel like I am doing so well, and then I just let myself spiral out of control where I feel like all my hard work is put to waste and I get really hard on myself. I feel like all the training I have been doing has been making me bulk up…I know that is an exaggeration but I know what I like to look like, and how to be that way, so I decided I’m going to tone it down, work at my own pace with more cardio, and cut down my meal portion sizes. My trainer wanted me eating 5-6 meals a day and I feel like since I’ve been doing that, I am constantly anticipating meals when I’m not even hungry. I decided I will not time my food intake, and I will go back to “what I know” to be in the shape that I want. To get back to normal, and the size I’m comfortable with, the diet I went by was to eat a large breakfast with egg whites and a small green smoothie first thing in the morning…and then eat when I’m HUNGRY. When I am hungry I will still eat a clean diet, but I will not time myself like a little dog anymore. It’s exhausting thinking about food so much. I think it’s what has been triggering my cravings and overeating.
I am home from vacation and I already miss Florida. I miss being with my best friend, laying in my bikini all day and going out on the town. I am so fortunate to be able to have gone, it was a lovely break from everything. Now that I am home I decided I am going to de-clutter my life and my emotions. I made a new vision board also. It needed some updating from the last one 
I tried to put an emphasis on purity, the importance of love, my fitness passion, my need for thriving adventures like skydiving and zip lining, it emphasizes my need for hiking and travel, as well as art which I’m strongly passionate about. I have it saved on my phone and on my Mac’s wallpaper image. I want to see it everyday and remind myself of my goals. Also, for the first time in ages-I have a magazine clip-out of one of my fitness Idol’s above my mirror in my room. I’m hoping it’ll trigger morning motivation to stick to my goals. It’s an AD for Lean Body but has fitness model Kelsey Byers on it, which as I’ve said before, is a HUGE inspiration. It’s so important to have healthy fitness inspirations. Too many young girls think that it’s so important to be the skinniest girl in the room when you should be really focusing on the inside, and part of that is a healthy body that will prevent sickness and future medical problems.
So Day 1, back in my groove I started the day off with a green smoothie, worked, and after work I had a long Epsom bath with Michael Buble Pandora, my favorite sage candle, and gave myself a face mask. It was great, then I went to Zumba with my friend Ashley, did about 20 more minutes of cardio, then prepared chicken and salad for the week. I was still craving ice cream so I made a Chobani yogurt with a little nutella and a banana and now my ice cream craving is gone. I have a week of exciting workouts ahead of me. Tomorrow I think I’m going paddleboarding and if not, at least running Greenlake with another friend, then I am doing a lot of hot yoga, a few Zumba classes, a could body sculpt classes as well as hiking to Melakwa Lake. I will lose 10 pounds by mid-December. That is my goal and I’m sticking to it!
Are u not going to be part of the bikini competition team u mentioned before? I don’t think u trainer was trying to do you any harm. It seems what they were trying to do was to increase ur lean body mass some and then come contest season, ur appearance would be ready for the stage. Im sure they have ur best interests in heart & want u to do well when its time to compete since they have alot of knowledge of what the judges are looking for. I know its hard to trust, when ur used to doing it your self, so maybe u will reconsider and talk it over with your trainer. Hope it all goes well!
By: transformationpics on September 22, 2012
at 6:29 am
No I am still going to do it I just need to ease myself into it and control portion sizes and work up to more meals. Right now it’s just been hard to control portion sizes. It has nothing to do with my trainer she’s great, I just need to slow it down a little because I changed my whole diet so quickly. I will still get to where I was with her.
By: Tiare Vincent on September 22, 2012
at 6:34 am
When ur trainer gave u the diet,did they not say eat xx amount of ounces of this,this and that each meal? If they gave u precise measurements like in the example given, did u not properly measure out ur portions? I’m sorry if I’m asking to many follow up questions:)
By: transformationpics on September 22, 2012
at 8:20 am
I feel your frustration! The 5-6 meals a day thing has caused me to put on 15 pounds that I now have to get off! I am on the same journey of listening to my body for what and when to eat. I’m praying for the both of us to reach our goals!
By: cebrought on September 22, 2012
at 6:36 am
Oh my goodness I’m sorry!!!! But is to finally hear someone going through the same thing!!!! I feel like its maki me pack more pounds and I know it’s probably the portions but I feel like my old portions with 3 normal sized meals and a couple tiny snacks of fruit in between worked much easier and allowed me to actually enjoy what I was cooking. I wish u luck in getting off the pounds and yes, every body is so different and we have to listen to what our bodies need
By: Tiare Vincent on September 22, 2012
at 6:41 am
I can empathize with your situation completely. I do have to say though that increasing the number of meals and reducing the size has taught me to eat smaller meals except that now like you, I eat when I need to rather than following a timetable and I make sure that I have a piece of fruit or dry snacks with me if i feel hungry at the wrong time. This way I still keep the main meal at a manageable level.
My trainer has been great in also making sure I don’t feel guilty when I go off on a vacation weekend and drink and eat out of my zone. This is helping me enjoy life and I agree with both of you……..you cant go through life feeling guilty about the things you enjoy doing.
I am loosing weight and getting the body I want again…..I think you look great and being happy and not stressed about your situation will only make you achieve your goal faster and maintain far longer.
keep it up………
By: amaanjourney on September 25, 2012
at 8:11 am
loved your comment and thank you! but yes my focus this past week was to eat for nourishment and get my portion sizes under control which has been an obstacle for me but I’m bound and determined to get better at it! I’m glad you are getting the body you want! and i agree that you can’t be stressed about the situation, it only makes it worse and makes me practically obsessed which works in the opposite affect sometimes.
By: Tiare Vincent on September 26, 2012
at 8:00 am